The 2017 Preview: Part 2 (April-June)

You can check out Part 1, January-March, here.

Now, without any ado, Part 2 (see what I did there?)

April

What to say about April? Well, there is another Emma Watson flick, this time she speaks with an American accent for reasons that confound me (unnecessary accent work is one f my biggest pet peeves), that also stars Tom Hanks, called The Circle. Here’s the trailer:

Not bad, right? Kind of a modern 1984.

April will also bring us a Julia Roberts drama (Wonder), a fully animated Smurfs movie (sorry NPH), some kind of DeNiro comedy (The War With Grandpa), the movie where Jenny Slate and Chris Evans met (Gifted) that would be more exciting if it were a comedy and not a drama, some Christian cinema (The Case for Christ) to be timed up with Easter, oh, and one little movie called…

Fast & Furious 8

That either fills you with excitement, apathy or disdain. We have had 7 Fast & Furious movies to help you form an opinion, if you are in the apathy camp an 8th one isn’t going to make you budge. The new film certainly won’t move anyone that hated the movies off of that opinion. Fortunately a significant portion of the world is with me and my wife on team “can’t wait”.

May

The beginning of summer, when the movies start rolling in week after week at a breakneck pace that even the biggest film geeks can’t keep up with. Here are a few of the important questions May will be asking us to answer.

Is Amy Schumer really a movie star?

Trainwreck was terrific and a big hit, but one hit doesn’t make you a movie star. In Snatched Schumer gets to star along side Goldie Hawn, who was one of the first female comedic actors to be considered beautiful and funny and could carry movies that weren’t Rom Coms, which seems to be exactly what Schumer wants to be able to do. Does this trailer seem like she is playing the same part as her Trainwreck character? Yup, but Goldie Hawn seemed like she was playing the same person in every movie from 1977 to 1987 so I’m not going to judge.

Will we ever have a truly great Alien movie again?

Prometheus wasn’t a bad movie, but it kind of missed the point. Alien isn’t awesome because of the lore surrounding the stories. Alien was awesome because it was a great horror thriller. Aliens was awesome because it was a kick ass action movie. If Ridley Scott wants to push the lore, well, Im not sure anyone cares. Here’s hoping he just makes a great movie.

Does anyone want another Pirates of the Caribbean movie?

Well, do you? Because you are getting one. Of course, last summer Johnny Depp tried to revive one of his “hit” characters from a movie that made a lot of money but that no one seemed to like and it didn’t go well.

Can The Rock make everything work?

BaywatchBaywatch!!…Are you kidding me Dwayne Johnson? Baywatch! What’s crazy is I think I want to see it.

Do any of those questions actually matter? Of course not, in fact that may not really be answered because …

Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2

June

When I say summer is the time when movies start coming too fast for anyone to keep up with June is pretty much exhibit A. These are the week to week scheduled releases:

June 2nd

Wonder Woman
Captain Underpants

We all know what Wonder Woman is, and for the record I think the previews look great and seem to speak toward a much needed sense of humor that was missing from Batman v. Superman, but Captain Underpants? You shouldn’t sleep on the animated flick from Dreamworks that has a voice cast including Kevin Hart, Nick Kroll and Ed Helms. It wont have much competition in the kids movie department when it comes out.

June 9

World War Z 2
The Mummy

Tom Cruise versus Brad Pitt!

June 16

Cars 3
The Book of Henry

The Kingsman sequel was originally scheduled to be released this weekend too, fortunately saner heads prevailed it has been moved to October. I wrote about this the other day when discussing whether Disney’s 2017 could match the studios historic 2016 but whatever you think about Cars and where it fits in the Pixar pantheon you should know that it sells more merchandise than any other Pixar film, by a mile. The Book of Henry is director Colin Trevorrow’s little movie he is putting out in between Jurassic World and Star Wars Episode IX.

June 23

Transformers: The Dark Knight
Rock that Body
The Beguiled

Counter programming alert! Rock that Body is a comedy starring Scarlett Johansen, Kate McKinnon, Zoe Kravitz and Demi Moore from one of the directors of Broad City and The Beguiled is Sofia Coppola’s latest.

June 30

Despicable Me 3
The House

If you thought Rock that Body sounded like it had a loaded comedy cast how does Will Ferrell and Amy Poehler sound? Yeah, that is what is going head to head with Despicable Me 3.

That is just a crazy full month of movies. It is so full that some of them will bomb, not because they are bad but because its just too many.